(Unsolicited) advice on becoming a parent.

COLLECTIVE WISDOM

“Be gentle on yourself!! This baby business is not for the faint of heart. There will be some days when it all comes together and others when it feels like you can't get anything right. Remember that it is ok to feel whatever you are feeling in that moment. As much as it is about that sweet baby it is also about you -- healing, learning, feeling, etc.”

“Accept help when offered! Don’t be too proud.”

“We have a housecleaner come in twice a month. Cost turned out to be manageable and worth it to us!”

“Cut your self some slack, remember you just made an entire human!! Also, get outside when you can and if you are feeling overwhelmed and it worries you, ask for help (with the baby and for yourself). No shame in it.”

“Don’t let everyone come for long back-to-back visits unless you know they will be helpful. Ask for any overnight visitors to do stuff like dishes, laundry, etc. so you can nap (you would think they would know to offer but apparently not - learned that the hard way).”

“Sunshine, exercise, outsource as much as you can. Give people who want to help your grocery list, your laundry, and anything else you can not do for awhile.”

“Get outside for a brief walk daily, as much as you’re physically able. Being housebound was so hard. Also, find a good moms group! That was oxygen for me.”

“Don’t try to think about getting your kid on any kind of sleep schedule. The time will definitely come for that, but for now, you don’t have to worry about it!”

“Let go of all the non essentials. Postpartum anxiety is the other side of the same coin as depression, so if your symptoms are more anxious than depressed, find ways to treat it so you can sleep.

“Hire as much done as you can afford. (Household cleaning, laundry, etc). 
Breathe breathe breathe. It gets exponentially better at 5 months...'“

“I really found it useful to talk to a professional, and although I know it doesn't seem like it now, it will get easier and better with time and finding ways that help you overcome it…take care of yourself first and foremost.”

“Trust yourself to know what you and your baby need. Everyone from family members to complete strangers will tell you how you need to x,y,z. There are so many different ways to be a good parent. Do what works for you."

Top cover photo credit: mishacohenphotography.com